Today I am featuring my friend Amanda’s words of wisdom on my blog!
I did what I believe was the best thing for me. For once, I had to be selfish. Even though a lot was lost, so much more was gained back. I always put others before me. I always said yes even when my mother told me “learn to say no.” Saying yes was never an issue until I wasn’t saying it for myself. I am not obligated to say or do anything, It should be because I want to. When you feel “pressured” to do things because someone makes you feel like you NEED to do this or else (your not my friend, you don’t love me, you don’t care, etc), then that’s when things change. Saying NO does not make you selfish, heartless or mean. This form of selfishness is the selfishness that every individual must have in order to take care of him or her self. We need to know when to set boundaries, when to be selfish and when to say no so that we can be treated with dignity and respect. Sometimes people will never learn to say no. They will never learn to get up and walk away when they are unhappy and unappreciated. It is not easy. There is so much you feel will be lost by walking away. Friendship.. Love.. Everything. But there comes a time when we must realize our own SELF WORTH. We don’t deserve to be treated like poop. People must treat others how they want to be treated (hopefully positive). I truly believe that those who don’t have self worth, self love, people who are just upset at life and the world, will treat others the way the feel about themselves. It’s ironic because all anyone really wants is to be loved! Yet, simply because someone is not happy with their self and does not “feel” loved, they begin to feel unloved, insecure, unhappy, depressed and as a result treat others like shit. They won’t even recognize love even if it punched them in the face. If you have no self love and you treat others like poop, you will never truly feel the love, or even most importantly you will never be able to hold on to it when it is there.
I swear i have learned so much in the past year, but oh, i’m not done learning! I don’t think I know it all. I know I don’t know it all. i know i’m not all fixed and better, but i’m heading in that direction of positive self development. This year has been shit. Shit = everything. I have made adjustments that have made a positive impact on my well being, but which have also made me blah. It’s life, it’s a movement. I love you, but I love me too! Like I talked to Deelyn (forgive me if i butchered your name) about energy and negativity… I just can’t waste my time and energy on negativity. If it’s negative, if it doesn’t make you happy, if it puts you down, if it just sucks all the fun and joy out of you, just leave it. walk away. Do not bring or keep that in your life. Hopefully someday [but of course only in my fantasy unicorn and rainbow world this exists] everyone can be happy and have positive vibes all around. And like i mentioned before, it all begins with SELF LOVE/WORTH. I cannot stress that anymore, lol. But whyyyy must everything be so difficult! sure, it begins with self love/worth, but wtf that shit ain’t easy b! Well once someone finds the key to that thennnnnnn we can all be happy loving people. *sigh* but until then, if you lack self love and worth, don’t stop trying to love yourself. Just don’t. keep trying until you love you and then keep loving until you can’t love no mo.
That is all.
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